Happy Thanksgiving!

I couldn't let this holiday go bye without acknowledging my THANKS.

I have spent so much time over the last couple weeks reading about Wyatt's journey, looking at pictures and researching his newest surgery coming in December. It's funny how I can read about his journey and feel all those feelings as if I am right back in the moment.

I grew up sort of fast in my teen years and although I had some tough years, I have always maintained that those experiences shaped my life and made me who I am. It took me a long time to realize that there was someone out there looking over me and guiding me through it all. For a long time I felt really alone and felt like nobody could possibly know how I was feeling or what I was going through. I remember a FEAR that was so strong I didn't think I would survive it.

I tell you this because we all have those moments that we question our FAITH and feel desperate and alone, it's what we do with those moments that make us who we are today.

I am THANKFUL for the opportunity to grow in my FAITH, BELIEVE in a GOD that can make miracles happen, for the ability to co parent three amazing children and TRUST in a GOD that always provides.

Before I had Wyatt I would see parents with children who had special needs or read stories about children with illnesses and my heart would physically ache for them. In fact there was a period of time Tony wouldn't let me read stories because I would be so sad for days. He would always make up happy ending to make me feel better. I thought there was no way I could handle it if my child were sick or suffering. The funny thing is now when I see or read these stories I feel the same way, my heart aches and I think I could not do it.

I was talking to a friend the other day and she started to cry as I was talking about Wyatt and she said to me. "My heart aches for you, I don't know how you do it." I immediately responded with Wyatt is going to be okay and I am not doing anything extraordinary I am just being his mom. When I got home I started to think that people feel like I do toward others about me. It was this strange feeling because I never thought of Wyatt like this. I know he has had quite a journey and his road is long but it is BEAUTIFUL. We have seen God work miracles with him and with us. Wyatt has defied all odds and we have built a stronger family, a stronger faith and a stronger marriage through him. I can't think of a better gift.

This got me thinking even deeper and reading others blogs the one's where my heart ached and all of them who speak of or believe in our GOD sound and feel like I do. Even in peoples darkest hours they find comfort and peace in him alone. They can take a tough moment, year, life or circumstance and GROW as individuals, families and in their FAITH. How amazing is this? My heart aches but could so easily REJOICE in the strength that only our GOD provides. How AWESOME is our GOD?

My heart will ache going forward for those that have not yet found their FAITH or who are not yet at PEACE that he will provide. Those who were like me when I was a teenager and felt lost and alone, when the FEAR consumed me and I didn't think I would survive. I pray tonight that all those parents, teenagers or children find our GOD and learn not to FEAR but rather have FAITH.

Since the moment Wyatt was born I have trusted, believed and prayed without fail. I had many moments of sadness and anxiousness but I never lost FAITH. I have always believed without fail God would provide and he has. I knew if I ask he would answer (although sometimes not as clear as I would like).

The last two weeks we have been having a lot of debate over how the schedule for the next two months will work. Trying to work out the who, what, when, how, where and whys. I have remained calm that the answers will come. I have questioned myself and some decisions I made and in some instance started to doubt myself based on others opinions or thoughts. And just as he always has GOD has shown me the path and reassured me that we are going the right direction. I know if we continue to follow him and him alone we will continue on this beautiful journey, see more miracles and watch this amazing 2.5 year old grow up to be an amazing old man some day.

That is what I am thankful for. :)

I also feel it important to tell all of you how blessed and thankful I am to have you in our lives and praying for Wyatt. Their is nothing more powerful than prayer and having all of you thinking of us, lending a helpful hand, or listening to us when we need to talk has been such a great gift. It always reminds me that we are not alone in this journey, not today and not ever.

GOD BLESS YOU and HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Tony, Melissa, Joey, Noah and Wyatt